Being John Malkovich review

 Number 500 on the top 1000 films of all time is the surrealist fantasy-comedy 'Being John Malkovich.'

Craig Schwartz (John Cusack) is a down-and-out puppeteer living in New York City. He is trapped in a loveless marriage with his wife Lotte (Cameron Diaz.) When he finds work as an office-clerk, he stumbles upon a mysterious portal that leads him into the mind of John Malkovich. He discovers that for fifteen minutes a day he can literally be John Malkovich. He and his co-worker Maxine (Catherine Keener) then decide to exploit this by charging people $200 for the experience of 'Being John Malkovich.'

I have watched over 500 films on this list. I have watched comedies, dramas, musicals, romances and horrors. And this has to be one of the weirdest, zaniest, most creative films I have ever seen. It takes a simple concept, which could have easily become tedious, and kept taking it to new levels. The surrealism is what made everything so relatable. In many ways, the film is like a daydream - who hasn't thought about being a celebrity for a day? It's one hell of a vicarious thrill if completely bonkers.

Although could we expect anything less from Spike Jonze? This was the man who went onto the direct the absolutely excellent and similarly creative 'Her.' But what's most impressive is that 'Being John Malkovich' was his directorial debut, as well as the debut of Charlie Kauffman, who penned the script. Kauffman was up for the best Original Screenplay Oscar, but he ultimately lost to Alan Ball and 'American Beauty.' While 'American Beauty' is a good film in its own right, it is pretentious, and not nearly as creative as 'Being John Malkovich.' Kauffman penned a great script that didn't take itself too seriously.

But it only worked because John Malkovich agreed to star in it. Reportedly he only wanted to produce and instead recommended Tom Cruise, but Kauffman was adamant that it had to be Malkovich in the role. When the studio also suggested other actors, Kauffman stuck to his guns. This was a great decision, as the film wouldn't have worked with another actor in the role.

Cameron Diaz also really surprised me. She was virtually unrecognisable as Lotte. I have never rated her much as an actress, but she did the drama well here. And although Craig Schwartz was a slimy toad, John Cusack played the role well. He was intriguing enough to want to keep watching. He was also weak-minded enough to be influenced by the scheming Maxine who was a Lady Macbeth character of sorts. She machinates much of the film's conflict including the scheme to charge people to inhabit John Malkovich's mind.

Being John Malkovich might have been one of the zaniest films ever-made, but it is definitely worth a watch. 

Green Street Hooligans review

 Number 767 on the top 1000 films of all time is the British crime-drama 'Green Street Hooligans.'

Matt Buckner (Elijah Wood) is a journalism major who was kicked out of Harvard after taking the fall for his cokehead roommate. He goes to London to live with his sister Shannon (Clare Forlani) and her English husband Steve (Marc Warren.) There Matt is befriended by Steve's brother Pete (Charlie Hunnam) who leads the local firm - the Green Street Elite - a gang of football hooligans who support West Ham football club.

If you were wondering what Elijah Wood was doing after LOTR and Charlie Hunmman before he became a transatlantic star in the American tv series Sons of Anarchy, they were starting trouble in London's East End. But, before that, we need to address the huge elephant in the room: Charlie Hunnam. His Cockney accent is regarded as one of the worst in film history, and it was on-par with Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins. It didn't help that Hunnam was saddled with such cumbersome dialogue; it was like he had been directed to recite the Cockney Rhyming Slang dictionary. Do people really talk like that?

You can see Charlie Hunnam's acting potential, but he was so rough around the edges, it's difficult to believe that just three years later, he would go onto star in Sons of Anarchy, where he does a great Californian accent. Speaking of accents, I just read that Clare Forlani who played Shannon is actually English. She does a much better accent than Charlie Hunnam. The actor who plays Matt and Shannon's father - Henry Goodman is also English, with Elijah Wood being the only true American in the cast.

Speaking of Elijah Wood, he was great as the transatlantic fish-out-of-water. At first, he is very out of place, but he soon fits right in with Pete and the rest of their gang, as they clash with the other firms. He isn't a big or threatening presence, but you can clearly see his progression from weak outsider to a force to be reckoned with.

At times, the violence was excessive and over-the-top, but this was still an entertaining film that displayed the loyalty that these gangs have to each other. they take so much identity in where they're from and what football clubs they support. Although I find it difficult to believe that any of the GSE would be able to hold down full-time jobs while being part of the film. What school would want to employ Pete as a PE teacher? His fellow hooligan Dave (Ross McCall) is an airline pilot. Where does he find time to be a hooligan with his busy schedule?

 The story itself is good enough, while being predictable and cheesy. This is no more evidence than the ending which let the film down. *Spoiler alert*

The GSE had a final showdown with long-standing rivals - the Milwall firm 'the NGO.' But Shannon randomly drives down to the fight as well. Inevitably, this draws attention from the Milwall thugs. And Pete has to sacrifice himself to allow Matt to get his sister to safety. This was a silly, illogical contrivance. There's no explanation for how Shannon would know about the fight or where it was, and she had no reason to be there, except to cause unnecessary conflict. If it wasn't for her, Pete would still be alive. And don't get me started on the stupid slow-motion and choral singing.

That notwithstanding, I ultimately did enjoy Green Street. Sure, it was cheesy, but it was also an intense and rapt look at the hooliganism that dominates UK football.

Stardust review

 Number 532 on the top 1000 films of all time is Matthew Vaughn's 2007 fantasy romantic-drama 'Stardust.'

Tristan Thorn (Charlie Cox) is a young man from the fictional Victorian village of Wall. In love with an already betrothed woman, he ventures into the neighbouring fantasy land of Stormhold to collect a fallen star that has taken the form of a woman called Yvaine (Clare Danes.) However, a coven of witches led by Lamia (Michelle Pfeiffer) are also seeking Yvaine in their quest for immortality. Meanwhile, Stormhold's dying king (Peter O'Toole) decides that his successor should be whoever can find the ruby he has thrown into the sky. His squabbling sons led by Prince Septimus (Mark Strong) start fighting to become the new king.

This was a fun re-imagining and subversion of the fairy-tale, as well a great take on the fantasy genre. Like science-fiction, I find fantasy to be full of pretentiousness - authors desperate to show off how creative they are put all their efforts into world-building and purple prose, neglecting their characters and narrative. The result is usually an overly-serious and stuffy story.

 Yet Stardust was refreshing and charming. There was no shortage of well-choregraphed, slapstick fights, as well as comedic characters. Robert De Niro as the effeminate pirate Captain Shakespeare is a prime example. De Niro has such a reputation for playing grizzled, old gangsters, it's difficult to imagine him as cross-dressing dame, but he did the comedy so well. He only had a supporting role, but a scene-stealing one.

Similarly, the old man (David Kelly) guarding the wall was great. He uses his staff to fiercely stop Tristan from crossing realms. Granted, he isn't very effective, but it was great slapstick all the same. And there's loads more examples of quiet humour from Lamia's youth potion wearing off leading to her hair falling out and her breasts sagging, to the king's sons committing fraticide one by one. When one of them has his throat slit, he bleeds blue blood. All of these were nice little touches.

I wish my praise could extend to Charlie Cox, but he was very bland and sappy as Tristan Thorn. Arguably, he becomes progressively more heroic, but he is still a rather dull protagonist. It's a shame as I've seen Charlie Cox in more action-oriented roles and he's very good, but he was nothing out the ordinary here. Mark Strong and Michelle Pfeiffer made great villains though. Generally, I've only seen Mark Strong in villainous roles, but he does do them so damn well.

All in all, I did enjoy Stardust. It was wonderfully creative. Yes, Charlie Cox, is sappy, but Stardust proved that fantasy does not need to be dark and serious all the time.

Platoon review

 Number 192 on the top 1000 films of all time is Oliver Stone's war film 'Platoon.'

Platoon follows a group of soldiers fighting within the Vietnam War. The main character is the young, liberal Chris Taylor (Charlie Sheen) who quickly becomes disillusioned. His superior officers, the hot-headed and psychotic Sergeant Barnes (Tom Berenger) and the more enlightened Elias (Willem Dafoe) clash on the best way to lead their troops. Keith David, Forest Whitaker and Johnny Depp all co-star.

Since I started this challenge, I've watched my fair share of Vietnam war films and I don't think that Platoon was anything special. It didn't bring anything new to the table. Sure it was entertaining and watchable. It was frenetic, fast-paced and dramatic, but there wasn't enough to delineate it from some of its contemporaries. I think a lot of that was down to the characterisation. The cast was large and confusing with the different characters not being clearly delineated enough from each other. In fact, the three main characters are really the only ones I can remember with any certainty. The heinous Sergeant Barnes was definitely recognisable, but all of his cronies blended into one. And Willem Dafoe and Charlie Sheen always stand out anywhere. And like with many war films, all of the characters are dressed the same - in uniforms and helmets only serving to make things more confusing.

Furthermore, the characters were all just so unlikeable. Okay, Sergeant Barnes is the villain - he kills a Vietmanese woman in cold blood and later tries to rape two Vietmanese girls - so you would expect him to be nasty. Barnes has plenty of cronies that are just as bad as him. But there really wasn't any likeable characters that you wanted to root for.  Even the protagonist Chris shows signs of instability, at times, blindly shooting at anything in sight. True, at times, he does do the right things like preventing Barnes from raping those girls, but there wasn't anything in him that made me want him to succeed. Part of that was down to Charlie Sheen. Honestly, I don't think he's the greatest actor in the world. 

The platoon's commanding officer was Lieutenant Wolfe (Mark Moses) but he was too young and ineffective to be any good. And another of the sergeants - O'Neil (John C. Mcginley) is a coward and spends most of the battles hiding in the foxholes. Largely, the film is just nasty people doing nasty things. I get it, war changes people. War can turn the best men into monsters. But it doesn't make them the most likeable of characters.

Platoon was certainly watchable enough, but I'm not sure how much I actually enjoyed it. It was just horrible people being horrible to each other.

Ferris Bueller's Day off review

 Number 425 on the top 1000 films of all time is John Hughes's teen comedy drama 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off.'

Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) is a high-school slacker. He fakes illness to skip school for the day joined by his best friend, the neurotic Cameron (Alan Ruck) and Ferris' girlfriend (Mia Sara.) In the meanwhile, he is relentlessly pursued by his high school dean Ed Rooney (Jeffrey Jones) who is determined to prove that he is up to trouble. He is also separately pursued by his sister Jeannie (Jennifer Grey) who similarly believes that Ferris is faking his illness.

To say that Ferris Bueller has had a massive cultural impact would be an understatement. It's constantly parodied and referenced in popular culture. Deadpool parodying the famous end scene is just one of the million examples. Part of its cultural legacy comes from the film's intertextual humour. Ferris constantly breaks the fourth wall by directly addressing the audience and explaining his inner thoughts. This was a great insight into the character and it provided a lot of the film's humour.

But Matthew Broderick was also great at physical comedy. The famous scene of Ferris  lip-syncing and dancing in the parade was so much fun to watch. It was made even better by virtue of how that was filmed in public and contains unscripted dancing of genuine members of the public. Another great scene is when Ferris is rushing home so as not to be caught out by his returning parents.

But I think another reason it was so popular was how relatable it was. I feel at that age we all have dreams of skiving off school and getting into trouble. We all have fantasies of what we could do if we had the chance. Granted it probably wouldn't be as anything as fantastical as what we see here. I certainly would not be lip-synching on a parade float, but at least I would be out there enjoying life as a teenager rather than being condescended to by a passionless teacher. It depicts a very romanticised view of a more innocent time and it provides a nostalgic lens for modern audiences to look back on.

I just wish that we could have focussed a little more on Cameron. He was the foil to Ferris' carefree ways. Against Cameron's wishes, they drive to downtown Chicago in his dad's vintage Ferrari before leaving it with a parking attendant. Ferris promises that they'll return it undamaged before Cameron's dad even notices. We get glimpses that Cameron's dad is this hard-arse, over-bearing father who projects fear. Cameron is very wary about upsetting him. Yet we never see any of this first-hand. I think something like this could have really helped to flesh out his character, but perhaps it would have been too dark for a comedy.

But overall I really did enjoy this film. It was a funny watch and in lieu of any profound concluding remarks, I'll quote the film's key lesson "life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you'll miss it."