Ten films that should not be on the top 1000 films of all time

 Since 2015, I have been watching and reviewing the top 1000 films of all time. In these nine years, I have watched many films that did not deserve a place on that coveted list. These are just ten examples. And yes, I'm going to get some heat for this, but such is life. This list is in no particular order but chronologically.

Sabrina (1954)

This rom-com from the Golden Age of Hollywood is living proof of how badly the Hollywood machine can backfire.

On paper, the film should have worked. It's directed by Billy Wilder. It stars Audrey Hepburn, Humphrey Bogart and William Holden, but it was so dull and predictable. There was next to no dramatic tension. it didn't help that Bogart lacked any chemistry with Holden or Hepburn. That was due to how they didn't get on behind the scenes.

Either way this was not a good film at all.

Manhattan (1979)

I've watched a few Woody Allen films in my time, but Manhattan is my least favourite. For one, it was not funny at all. For two, Woody Allen plays the same character that he always does - a neurotic Jewish man going through a middle-aged crisis. For three, the characters spend most of the film name-dropping philosophers like they're wannabe intellectuals. Finally, the central love-story was deeply uncomfortable.

It followed Woody Allen - playing a forty-two year old man in a relationship with the seventeen-year-old Tracey (Muriel Hemingway.) She was only sixteen at the time of filming.

Field of Dreams (1989)

Build it and he will come. Who? An insomniac looking to watch a film so boring it will put you to sleep? You'll be in luck with 'Field of Dreams.'

This dull film was severely lacking in tension or anything that made it remotely interesting to watch. It was so lacking in conflict that I could summarise the plot in a simple sentence: a man going through a mid-life crisis builds a baseball ring to solve his daddy issues.

The Bourne Identity (2002)

This film kicked off a whole franchise. How is a mystery to me. And its successors aren't much better either.

It follows Jason Bourne (Matt Damon,) a man with amnesia trying to rediscover his identity. It's funny that the Bourne Identity struggled to find its identity too. Is it an action-thriller? Not with its clear lack of memorable villains. Is it a romance? Not if the tepid love story was anything to go by.

The Bourne Identity? More like the Bourne Identiless to me.

Crash (2004)

Crash won the Best Picture Oscar for 2005. I have no idea how. It should have been nowhere near the Best Picture Oscar category. And it definitely should not have won. That honour should have gone to Brokeback Mountain. I said what I said.

Paul Haggis' clumsy and direction resulted in a contrived film that drastically over-simplified the race debate in the US. Thandie Newton and Terrence Rhodes' great performances were not enough to solve this car-crash of a film.

Running Scared (2006)

I'm still confused as to who thought this was one of the best thousand films of all time. A twelve-year-old boy? As it seemed to be written, filmed and edited by a twelve-year-old boy. You had filters from a 2000's Youtube video, Vera Farmilgia reduced to a sex object and ridiculously gratuitious violence. Not even the charismatic Paul Walker could save this disastrous film.

Michael Clayton (2007)

Michael Clayton isn't a bad film, but it certainly wasn't worthy of a place on this list. It was an underwhelming, under-developed affair severely lacking in heart. No wonder it was number 977 on the top 1000 films of all time. 

Tilda Swinton won an Oscar while George Clooney was nominated for one. But Michael Clayton was not worthy of Oscars, let alone a place on this list.

Despicable Me (June 2010)

How on God's green Earth did this film star a whole franchise? It has Steve Carell who does drama and comedy. But there was nothing funny or dramatic about his performance here. It was just annoying. And Hollywood writers take note: fart jokes are only funny once or twice, not a thousand bloody times.

The Town (September 2010)

Don't forget that Ben Affleck has won Oscars for both directing and writing. But he certainly did not win them for this generic, forgettable heist film.

The Town was an overly-simple boring affair that was not helped by Affleck's wooden performance in his lead role. Jeremy Renner in a supporting role was the only redeeming aspect of this tedious affair.

The Hunger Games (2012)

I'm going to get a lot of hate for this, but the Hunger Games made me so irrationally angry.

Firstly, the whole film is predicated on a gaping plot chasm, let alone hole. It makes no sense that Panem - a tyrannical government punishing their citizens for rebelling by forcibly entering twelve of their people into a fight to the death. But when Katniss Everdeen breaks the rules by volunteering as tribute, what do they do? They let her compete. She's broken the rules and they still let her compete.

That coupled with two-dimensional villains and underdeveloped side characters, who have meaningless death, make for an irritating film. Not even J-Law or Woody Harrelson were enough to save this damp squib.

Come at me in those comments. I don't care. These were over-rated films that are not some of the 1000 best films of all time. Did I miss any? Let me know.

Flight Review

 Number 987 on the top 1000 films of all time is Robert Zemeckis' drama 'Flight.'

William 'Whip' Whitaker (Denzel Washington) is a pilot with a drinking problem. When the plane he is piloting malfunctions, he successfully performs a crash-landing resulting in only six deaths out of a complement of 102. But the subsequent investigation raises questions about his sobriety while on the job.

I often find Denzel Washington very over-the-top. Or maybe that's the roles he chooses to play. But I think that the character of Whip played to his strengths. He wasn't a larger-than-life character, but a tragic hero looking for redemption. Washington brought a wonderful amount of vulnerability to the role. It was a sensitive portrayal of a man who is desperately hiding from the world. And he does redeem himself when he ultimately does the right thing at the end.

It also surprised me to learn that it was Robert Zemeckis directing this film. I would argue that he is best well-known for directing comedies particularly the Back to the Future franchise. But he did make a very interesting drama film with well-rounded performances. It was well-paced and took us into some nice emotional depths. Although maybe this shouldn't be so surprising as he did win the Oscar for directing Forrest Gump.

But I was less convinced by Whip's relationship with prostitute/junkie Nicole (Kelly Reilly.) The two characters are very similar. They are both addicts. They are both looking for redemption. I don't want to take anything away from Kelly Reilly. She gave a sensitive portrayal of an emotionally damaged character. And her American accent was so good that I would never have guessed that she is actually a Londoner. But she and Whip were portrayed as star-crossed lovers. And I didn't see enough evidence to justify such a conclusion.

Yet this didn't stop Flight from being a very good film with a wonderfully understated performance by Denzel Washington.

Crash review

 Number 383 on the top 1000 films of all time is Paul Haggis' crime drama film 'Crash.'

Crash follows a group of intersecting characters and how they interact with each other across Los Angeles. Some of these characters include LA District Attorney Rick Cabot (Brendan Fraser,) his wife Jean (Sandra Bullock) a collection of police officers including Graham Waters (Don Cheadle,) Sergeant John Ryan (Matt Dillon) and Officer Tom Hansen (Ryan Philippe,) and film producer Cameron Thayer (Terrence Howard) and his wife Christine (Thandie Newton.)

Crash won the Best film Oscar. This was a controversial decision as many thought that Brokeback Mountain should have won instead. Even director Paul Haggis doesn't think Crash should have won. I haven't seen Brokeback Mountain so I can't comment on the first point, but I do agree that Crash wasn't a worthy Best Picture winner. It is an overly-ambitious and rushed film that tries to do too much in too little time. Rather than being a cohesive film, it is more of a collection of vignettes with a very loose story-thread connecting all the moving parts.

This thread is so loose that many of the connections feel contrived. Detective Graham Waters is looking for his errant brother, Peter (Larenz Tate) who just so happens to have been killed and left by the side of the road by Officer Tom Hansen. Not only that but he and his friend Anthony (Ludacris) carjack who else but Rick and Jean Cabot. When Christina is victim to a horrific car crash, who should come and save her but Sergeant John Ryan - a racist cop who sexually assaulted her the night before.

In my summary, I mentioned just a few of the different characters and storylines. There are so many that inevitably some do get overshadowed or short-changed. Despite Sandra Bullock being top-billed, she only appears in a handful of scenes. She initially comes across as a snooty and racially prejudiced woman - she doesn't like the locksmith Daniel (Michael Pena) because he is Hispanic. However, after a fall down the stairs where she is rescued by her Hispanic housekeeper, she has a change of heart. It's not exactly a road to Damascus moment, but we've given to understand that she's learned the error of her ways. At least that was the intention, but we really don't see enough evidence to justify this transformation.

I touched upon Christina's sexual assault earlier. This is played out in a great fashion. She and her husband Cameron are unjustly pulled over by Sergeant John Ryan. Ryan accosts the couple by accusing them of having oral sex while driving. He makes them exit the vehicle and then evasively searches Christine. He threatens to report Cameron's conviction unless he apologises for his supposed misoffence. Cameron does so and the two are let go. Later on, they have a huge fight as Christine is angry that Cameron allowed her to be taken advantage of. 

Skip to the car crash scene and Christine is being rescued by Ryan. This had the potential to be such an interesting plot thread. Christine's life is saved by the police officer who molested her. How does this change her thoughts on the police? How does this change her thoughts on being sexually assaulted? How will this affect her relationship with Cameron? We don't know, because her storyline is barely touched upon again. This isn't to denigrate Newton's acting. She was fantastic - conveying horror, panic and terror all in one, but her material short changed her. 

Speaking of acting, I also think that Terrence Howard was excellent. He is arguably less 'woke' than his wife and far more respectful of the police and white institutions in general. The two have a massive argument where she accuses him of not being as "black" as she. However, as he is slowly confronted with the bigotry all around him, especially in the film world, he becomes a pressure cooker waiting to blow. This happens when Peter and Anthony attempt to carjack him and are then confronted by none other than Tom Hansen. See what I said about contrivances? Anyway, in a sharp contrast to his previous encounter with police, he tearfully confronts the officers, ready to be shot by them. Terrence Howard played this part brilliantly - the indignation, the anger. It was great.

Anthony's storyline was also a little contrived. He is a carjacker, but he is also alert to the social injustice around him. After his failing carjacking of Cameron, the film producer tells him he is an embarrassment. Anthony goes onto carjack a white van which he takes to a fence. But, lo and behold, the fence is full of South-East Asian refugees. Instead of letting a fence buy them to sell them to the highest bidder, he frees them in the city's Chinatown. Again, I don't think there was enough groundwork to justify such a sudden change of heart. Sure, it was nice to see, but I don't think it made a lot of sense.

A separate storyline sees Iranian shop owner Farhad (Shaun Toub) buy a gun to confront the locksmith Daniel who he believes has robbed his shop. When he goes to shoot him, Daniel's daughter jumps in the way. But she is fine, as Farhad had unknowingly loaded his gun with blanks. Farhad shoots the daughter at point-blank range. Even blanks would do some damage at that short of a distance. This felt like another contrivance. Farhad is a tragic character - a man who has tried his best to realise the American Dream and cannot understand why he has not been more successful. He isn't an inherently bad man, but one who feels let down by the system. I guess if he had killed Daniel's daughter than his whole tragic backstory would be negated. It makes sense, but I wish they could have done this in a less contrived way. It was point-blank range. 

Crash was a good film. It was gripping, tense with good performances especially from Howard and Newton. But it needed to be longer so many of its storylines could be properly fleshed out. And I certainly don't think it deserved the Best Film Oscar.