L'emmerdeur review

 L'emmerdeur is a 1973 French black-comedy which does not feature on the top 1000 films of all time.

Ralph Milan (Lino Ventura) is a contract killer preparing to assassinate his target in a hotel room. The only catch? The neighbour in the adjourning room - shirt salesman Francois Pignon (Jacques Brel) - is making preparations to kill himself. Milan has to stop his neighbour from suiciding otherwise the police will catch him in the act.

This film was a complete farce. It was a ridiculous scenario with ridiculous characters yet everything worked so well. It was a very funny film with oodles of black humour that are so popular in France or the UK. I can't see a film like this really having any success in the US. In fact Billy Wilder did do an American remake with Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau which came and went without much fanfare.

Milan and Brel made the ultimate odd couple trope with Milan being forced to become a reluctant hero of sorts - he has to stop Brel killing himself, not out of any sense of altruism, but for his own devious means. Most of the humour stems from this comical situation. Pignon irritates the life out of Milan who has no choice but to tolerate it or be exposed by the police.

Just like the characters, the actors also were great together. Ventura served as a brilliant straight man to the comically and tragically pathetic Brel who is heartbroken after his wife leaves him. There is no assortment of both physical humour and witty tongue-in-cheek jokes yet there is also plenty of space for emotional pathos. Despite how Milan initially has nothing but contempt for Brel, we see a begrudging relationship form between the two men. 

L'emmerdeur was a thoroughly entertaining film. Silly and farcical yes, but very funny all the same.

The Producers review

 Number 574 on the top 1000 films of all time is Mel Brook's black-comedy 'The Producers.'

Max Bilaystock (Zero Mostel) is a has-been Broadway producer desperately searching for his next hit. Leo Bloom (Gene Wilder) is a naive and neurotic accountant hired to audit Max's books. Together the two cook up a scam to make them rich. To this end, they produce a play called "Spring Time for Hitler," which celebrates the life of the notorious dictator.

The Producers was Mel Brooks' directorial debut. He won the Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay. He later went onto win the EGOT, as well as directing very funny films like Blazing Saddles and Robin Hood: Men in Tights. I was expecting a lot, but I was disappointed.

Sure I could see the blackness - Mel Brooks has said the only way to get back at genocidal maniacs like Hitler is to laugh at them. Except I didn't laugh at all. Not because I was offended by the risque subject matter, but because it just wasn't funny. The jokes either didn't land or were drawn out longer than was funny.

I also didn't rate the lead actors either. Gene Wilder was a frequent collaborator of Mel Brooks, going onto star in Young Frankenstein and Blazing Saddles. He was a funny man, but here he was painfully over-the-top. I understand that Leo Bloom was a deeply neurotic character, but Wilder took the neuroticism to an obnoxious level.

I didn't think Zero Mostel was much better as the hapless Broadway producer. He was similarly over-the-top and annoying. After a while, I became annoyed whenever I saw him on screen. The same went with Wilder. Considering both of them were the main characters, this was not a good thing.

I really wanted to like the Producers; I love Robin Hood, Men in Tights, but the Producers was a complete directorial debut dud.

Barton Fink review

 Number 548 on the top 1000 films of all time is the Coen Brothers' black-comedy Barton Fink.

Barton Fink (John Turturro) is an aspiring screen-writer who finally gets his big break in Hollywood. However, the true reality of Hollywood screen-writing is far removed from the dream. Jon Polito and John Goodman co-star.

In the pantheon of Coen Brothers' films, I would rank this as one of their lower-tiered efforts. The brothers are well-known for their surreal films like Oh brother, wherefore art thou or The Big Lebowski, as well as more straightforward films like Miller's Crossing and No Country for Old Men. Barton Fink seemed to straddle both worlds without really landing in either.

Barton soon becomes mixed-up in a murder which sees him strike up an unusual friendship with the gregarious Charlie Meadows (John Goodman) which, in fairness, does finish in a fiery and dreamscape climax. Yet the earlier parts of the film deal with more grounded ideas like Barton trying to write a script to appease the big-shot Hollywood producer Jack Lipnick (Michael Lerner.) If the film could have been surreal or straightforward, I would have been okay with it, but not both.

John Turturro and Jon Polito also starred in Miller's Crossing - a prohibition-era gangster film. Both of them were terrific bringing frenetic energy to the role. They were memorable. Here I can't say the same. Granted Jon Polito was only a supporting character - a lackey to Michael Lerner, but he didn't bring the same energy to the role. Neither did Turturro. They played the roles with restraint when excess would have been better.

That summarises my criticism of this film really: it tried to be too many things and ended up being hardly anything.

Duck Soup review

 Number 261 on the top 1000 films of all time is Leo McCarey's pre-code musical black comedy starring the Marx Brothers - Duck Soup.

Rufus T Firefly (Groucho Marx) has just been elected president of the country of Freedonia. However, his bumbling antics soon bring his country into conflict with the neighbouring Sylvania. It isn't helped by how its ambassador Trentino has sent his own spies Pinky (Harpo Marx) and Chicolini (Chico Marx) into Freedonia.

A common rebuttal of any criticism of older films revolves around how it was a different time and they haven't aged well. Yet Charlie Chaplin, arguably the Marx Brothers' biggest contemporary, released a number of comedies that hold up to this day. They are funny, unlike Duck Soup.

I barely laughed. If I'm being generous, I may have chuckled once or twice, but only because of how badly the film was trying and failing to be funny. Running jokes are all well and good along as they aren't done to death. Duck Soup hammered all its jokes into the ground. It was funny seeing the grand fanfare for President Firefly only to not have him appear - or it would have been if we had this joke once. Not three or four times. It became old very quickly.

And rather than a comedy film, it seemed like an eternal set-up for jokes that weren't funny and really predictable. Sure, comedies like Airplane are choc-a-block with cheesy jokes, but at least those were funny. There wasn't anything funny about Pinky squirting water at people only to have it squirted down his trousers or how he kept winding up the popcorn seller by taking his hat. Pinky's constant tooting of his horn was irritating too.

Also, what was with the weird songs? I know this was a musical, but the songs didn't seem to fit at all. They added nothing to the film except emphasising its cheesiness.

This film was only sixty-eight minutes long, but it felt so much longer due to its unnecessary musical numbers and running jokes. Was it just a different time? I'm not so sure. I think this film would have been just as unfunny in the 1930's as it is now.

Harold and Maude review

Number 255 on the top 1000 films of all time is the 1971 black romantic-comedy 'Harold and Maude.'

Harold Chasen (Bud Cort) is a young man who has a morbid fascination with death. He regularly enjoys staging his own suicide much to the dislike of his mother who is worried about her social status. But Harold then meets the carefree seventy-nine year old Maude (Ruth Gordon.) The two form an unlikely relationship.

I didn't care for this film at all. I did not like Harold's character. It would be fair to describe him as a nihilist. He is spiritually deadened and struggles to find any meaning in life. it can be difficult to write these characters so they're not annoying, spoiled or entitles, which is exactly how I would define Harold.

It didn't help that he had no discernible reason for his nihilism. You can argue that his relative affluence and wealth has left him spiritually deadened. The disconnected relationship with his shallow mother has probably done little to help matters. But I can't pinpoint a specific catalyst. Harold didn't have any defined reason for being so dead. Bud Cort also played the role with a smugness that made him irritating.

I also didn't like the film's depiction of suicide. It was gratuitous. Harold stages his suicide in multiple ways from immolation, to blowing his brains out to hanging and even slitting his wrists in a vivid display of red. It was all horribly romanticised. This is even more so considering how the only meaning he finds in his life is through death. His mother constantly dismisses his behaviours too; true she sends him to a shrink, but he is equally dismissive.

I would say that this film's redeeming feature is Ruth Gordon as Maude. She was enjoyable as a hedonistic, ageing hippy who gives no second though to breaking the rules. Despite how charming she was, it is difficult to deny that her relationship with Harold was weird. Director Hal Ashby always insisted that there was nothing untoward about it, but I don't agree. She's sixty years older than him. Flip the genders and see whether it's still the same.

I didn't care for Harold and Maude. Ruth Gordon was a delight, but Hal Ashby's treatment of suicide was off-putting.

Death at a Funeral review

 Number 915 on the top 1000 films of all time is the British black-comedy drama 'Death at a Funeral.'

Daniel (Matthew Mcfayden) and Robert (Rupert Graves) are two squabbling brothers attending their father's funeral. They are part of a larger dysfunctional family who have to settle their differences. Peter Dinklage, Ewen Bremner, Alan Tudyk, Peter Vaughn and Keeley Hawes all co-star.

This is an entertaining or not outstanding comedy that encapsulates the pitch-black humour that the UK is so well-known for. It certainly elicited a number of chuckles but it isn't laughing-in-the-aisles funny. Much of the humour comes from the dysfunctional nature of the family - in particularly Uncle Alfie (Peter Vaughn.) He is a wheel-chair bound OAP with a foul mouth.

The vulgar, crude pensioner who doesn't care what anybody thinks is a cliched character, but it's still entertaining to watch. That is especially true when you have Peter Vaughn in the role. There was some proper gross-out humour that would not fly in a Hollywood production.

What you would see in an American film is Alan Tudyk's character of Simon. Granted, Simon is English with Alan Tudyk doing a passable English accent, but he very much seemed to be based on the over-the-top American comedy that the Yanks seem to love so much. To help calm his nerves about the funeral, his fiancee, and Daniel's cousin, Martha (Daisy Donovan) gives him a valium. Except it isn't a valium, but an experimental hallucinogen.

In his drug-altered state, he knocks open the coffin spilling the family's dead patriarch onto the floor. But, worse, he later strips naked and climbs onto the roof of the building. It was all very over-exaggerated - I think the writers were playing up the hallucinogenic symptoms for comedy purposes, but it all became quite silly.

Yet the film also possessed a lot of heart with the character of Daniel who is struggling to step out of his more successful brother's shadow. Matthew Mcfayden did well bringing some much-needed gravitas to the more farcical proceedings. We definitely needed this sobering contrast especially when Frank (Peter Dinklage) reveals a dark secret about he and Daniel's father. This all culminates when Daniel gives a spontaneous, but heart-felt eulogy about his father.

Death at a Funeral was certainly not the funniest film I've ever seen, but it was definitely charming enough to earn its place on this list.

After Hours review

 Number 625 on the top 1000 films of all time is Martin Scorsesee's 1985 black-comedy 'After Hours.'

Paul Hackett (Griffin Dunne) is an office worker trying to get home from Manhattan's Soho district. However, a series of misadventures makes this task more difficult than it sounds.

What do you think when you think of a Martin Scorsesee film? Endless swear words? Gangster flicks? Robert De Niro? I bet you wouldn't think of this 1980's black-comedy. Compared to the likes of Raging Bull or Taxi Driver, it's definitely not as explosive or well-known.

It was definitely one of his zaniest, most-off-the-wall films with plenty of off-beat humour to keep the plot running along nicely. The premise is simple enough: an office worker desperate to get home keeps coming up against increasingly outlandish barriers. Yes, the film does stray into the world of absurdist fiction, but you're willing to suspend your disbelief.

It helps that you had Griffin Dunne who gave Paul Hackett an everyman quality, which kept the film grounded. He was in a relatable situation; I'm sure there are many of us have had desperate journeys trying to get home after a late night. I certainly have, although I haven't remained as affable as Paul did, despite everything happening to him.

It certainly might not be as memorable as the Departed, but it might be a nice palette-cleanser after Scorsesee's more violent efforts like Gangs of New York. Either way, this is one of Scorsesee's more overlooked efforts with a great ending that brought everything full-circle.

In the Heat of the Night review

 Number 322 on the top 1000 films of all time is the 1967 mystery-drama 'In the Heat of the Night.'

Virgil Tibbs (Sydney Poitier) is a Philadelphia police officer visiting his mother in Mississippi. When a town official is murdered, he is drafted into helping the local Chief of Police Bill Gillespie (Rod Steiger.) But the racist town folks are incredibly distrustful and hostile toward Virgil Tibbs.

It can be all too easy to dismiss America's fixation on race, as a mere perverse obsession. But then you watch films like this and you are reminded that less than sixty years ago, these racist attitudes were still alive and well. I'm not talking about the actual film either. Norman Jewison partly shot the film in Tennessee where the cast and crew were harassed by the locals. Plus, Sydney Poitier slept with a gun under his pillow. 

And Sydney Poitier was the driving force behind this film. He was great as Virgil Tibbs who bore all the racial abuse with a steely determination to solve the case. Poitier played the role with a righteous determination. He was terrific.

I would argue that he was even better than his co-star Rod Steiger who won the best Acting Oscar for his portrayal of Gillespie. Out of all the police, he is perhaps the most racist, but after being forced into working with Virgil, we see his outdated views changing. Steiger played this transformation well. But Poitier was the true star.

Another thing I liked was the simplicity of the film. Often in thrillers, like in sci-fi, you have writers trying to put in twist after twist to show how clever they are, when they're just making things convoluted. There is nothing wrong with simplicity. And that's where 'In the Heat of the Night' succeeded. Virgil Tibbs wasn't trying to decode the cyphers that the Zodiac Killer left. He wasn't tracking down the likes of Ted Bundy or Jeffrey Dahmer. Instead he was solving the murder of a single man. And the solution was far simpler than anybody thought.

Finally, I enjoyed the use of prolonged silences that really upped the tension especially where Virgil was facing off against a gang of white men looking to kill him. This silence was balanced well with Quincy Jones' excellent score which included Ray Charles on the title track.

In the Heat of the Night was a great watch with terrific performances from not only Rod Steiger, but, also, Sydney Poitier.

La Haine review

 Number 220 on the top 1000 films of all time is the French social thriller 'La Haine.' (The Hatred)

Vinz (Vincent Cassel,) Hubert (Hubert Kounde) and Said (Said Taghamaoui) are three friends and second-generation immigrants living in Paris. The day after a riot, where one of their friends is brutally beaten, we see the three young men navigating life in the ghettoes of Paris.

Part immigrant experience, part gritty drama, part slice-of life, La Haine was an illuminating look into working-class life within Paris. It was a far cry from the romanticised Paris that we see on social media. It was raw, gritty and stark. There were no frills - just an authentic portrayal of life in Paris. It strongly reminded me of similar dramas set in London like Kidulthood or Top Boy.

Those dramas have no pretensions; they don't impart any judgement on their characters. Instead, they give you the facts and allow you to decide for yourself. And that's what the best film makers do. They leave their biases behind and leave matters in the hands of the audience.

You could argue that Vinz, Hubert and Said aren't the most likeable of characters. They're destructive miscreants causing trouble wherever they go, but they're not meant to be liked. They aren't heroes. They aren't villains. They just are. We're forced to see the world through their eyes and nothing more. We have no choice.

What made La Haine so powerful was its realism. Everything felt so real. I was right there with the characters walking through the dark streets of Paris. And that was only made better through the excellent decision of rendering the film in monochrome. The stark black-and-white only made the action all the more poignant. There are no distracting colours to hide behind. 

Watching La Haine was a hell of a ride. It was intense and it didn't let up for a second. But it had a brilliant authenticity that carried things along very smoothly. For those who are thinking Paris is like the way you see in Amelie, think again. La Haine presents the oh so painful, but also necessary truth.

Stalag 17 review

 Number 202 on the top 1000 films of all time is Billy Wilder's 1953 war-film Stalag-17.

J.J Sefton (William Holden) is just one of six hundred and thirty sergeants being held prisoner in a German WW2 POW camp. He is a cynical, jaded loner who stays apart from the rest of his men. When an escape attempt that leads to two of his fellow prisoners being shot dead, he is quickly suspected of being a collaborator.

Admittedly, I wasn't looking forward to watching this. I thought that because it's a war film, it would be depressing, hard-going and difficult to watch. However, I was surprised to find it had plenty of laughs and light-heartedness. A lot of that was down to William Holden who was great as J.J Sefton. Sefton is your standard wise-cracking smart-arse. He is also enterprising often bartering with his guards for luxuries, as well as improvising a distillery, organising mouse-races for gambling, as well as other activities to keep the other prisoners entertained. Holden played the role well, stopping Sefton from becoming overly-cynical.

Billy wilder has done such a wide array of films over the years from noir to rom-coms to screwball comedies that it was no surprise that Stalag-17 succeeded in the way it did. It had the same off-beat humour as Some Like it Hot but also the drama of Sunset Boulevard.  Originally adapted from a stage-play, Wilder was able to keep that same theatrical feel, while making it suitable for the screen. He made everything bigger and better.

If the film fell down anywhere, it would have been the supporting cast. Although some of them like the German guards were funny in their own right, mostly they all blended into one. I did have trouble distinguishing the different characters. I did get mixed up between Lieutenant James Dunbar (Don Taylor) and security officer Frank Price (Peter Graves.) Other than Sefton, the only other character I really remember is Sefton's loyal, if naive aide Cookie (Gil Stratton) who also narrates the film.

Overall, I did enjoy Stalag-17. It was an entertaining war film with a great turn by William Holden.

Kung Fu Panda 2 review

 Number 962 on the top 1000 films of all time is John Stevenson's sequel to the original 2008 animated wuxia film Kung Fu Panda.

Po (Jack Black) now a respected Kung Fu master is called upon to defeat the peacock Lord Shen (Gary Oldman.) Lord Shen aims to dominate ancient China by using the newly-discovered gunpowder as a weapon. This could spell the end of Kung Fu. Meanwhile, Po starts to learn more about this mysterious past.

What can I say about this film which I haven't said about its predecessor? The animation was gorgeous. And the score was superior. Po remained a goofy yet sympathetic protagonist thanks to Jack Black's performance. James Hong, who plays Po's adoptive father Goose, was also great. As Po's adoptive father, he is very protective of his son. And he is naturally worried when Po goes off on his adventures. This concern was touching to see. One heart-twinging moment was when Po, just about to leave to defeat Lord Shen, reassures Goose that he'll be back before he can say noodles. As Po is leaving, Goose mumbles 'noodles' to himself. I'm not ashamed to say that I nearly cried.

Gar Oldman was also great as Lord Shen. He helped to bring the peacock to life with his borderline over-the-top performance, reminiscent of his villainous role in Leon the Professional. He made Lord Shen a far more memorable villain than Tai Hung.

John Stevenson also changed direction in this film choosing instead to take a darker tone. Nowhere is this more evident than when we learn more about Po's past of which I won't spoil here. Yet he also stayed close to the roots of kung fu films. From the wuxia films that I have seen, I have observed that they always champion the art and prowess behind kung fu. It is a source of national pride. Having this pride threatened with the invention of gunpowder, the tension and stakes went right through the roof.

Unfortunately, Kung Fu Panda 2 shares the same failures as its predecessor in its under-utilisation of its considerable cast. Despite starring in major kung fu films, Jackie Chan and Michelle Yeoh were majorly neglected.

That notwithstanding, I did enjoy Kung Fu Panda 2. It holds the rare title of being just as good as its predecessor. 

Kung Fu Panda review

 Number 672 on the top 1000 films of all time is the computer-animated wuxia film Kung Fu Panda.

Kung Fu Panda is set in ancient China. It follows the bumbling, but well-intentioned Po (Jack Black) - a giant panda bear who loves kung fu. When he is inadvertently named the Dragon-Warrior, it becomes his destiny to stop the evil snow leopard Tai Lung (Ian Mcshane.)

I enjoyed Kung Fu Panda a lot more than I thought I would. Generally I find wuxia films more style than substance. Sure the martial arts sequences look brilliant, but the films are always so overly-serious. This wasn't the case for Kung Fu panda. The best thing about the film was that it didn't take itself too seriously. And a lot of that was down to John Stevenson's strong direction.

Rather than making a parody like Dreamworks wanted, he instead created an action-comedy that took all the best elements of Wuxia, but also incorporating a lighter tone. Having Jack Black as Po also helped a lot. His comedy is always so expressive and physical which translated well to an animated role. Yet he also made Po a very sympathetic character.

Po is a kung fu enthusiast. He loves the martial arts. But he is also resigned to spending his life in his father 'Goose's' (James Hong) noodle restaurant. As a side note, James Hong was a delight as the over-protective and overly-affectionate father. Po very much becomes an unlikely hero as nobody, least of all, Master Shifu (Dustin Hoffman) - the Red Panda who has to train Po, has any faith in him succeeding.

Jack Black, Ian McShane, Dustin Hoffman, James Hong - there are some acting heavyweights in his film. But that's not all. Angeline Jolie, Jackie Chan, Seth Rogen, Lucy Liu and Michael Clark Duncan also all lend their voices. But with such a large cast and so many characters a lot of the acting talent was largely underutilised. Jackie Chan - star of so many kung fu films gave a disappointing contribution, while Lucy Liu and Seth Rogen largely blended into the background. Ian Mcshane's voice performance was nothing noteworthy either.

Having said that, I did enjoy Kung Fu Panda. It had gorgeous animation, and real heart. Unlike so many of its predecessors, it embraced portraying Kung-Fu under a more light-hearted lens.

Black Swan review

 Number 291 on the top 1000 films of all time is Darren Aronofsky's psychological thriller 'Black Swan.'

Nina (Natalie Portman) is a timid, but talented ballerina who has just been cast as the swan queen in Swan lake. Believing she isn't suitable to play the Black Swan, director Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel) pushes her to her limits. When rival ballerina Lily (Mila Kunis) enters the scene, Nina's sanity is pushed to breaking point.

If there was ever a director who made horror films that aren't actually horror films, it's Darren Aronofsky. There was the terrifying Requiem for a Dream. And Black Swan was equally scary. It was creepy, insidious with masterful camerawork that not only had Nina, but the viewer questioning their sanity. Aronofsky direction is to be praised. He depicted Nina's fleeting sanity very well. It could have been all too easy to show her in an all-out meltdown, but he was far more subtle than that. He was equally subtle with all the scares as well. We just see allusions and clips that something isn't quite right with her, but nothing grossly overt.

Natalie Portman won the Best Actress Oscar for her role. But I'm not sure how much I liked her characterisation of Nina. While Aronofsky directed the film well, I don't think I can apply the same praise to his direction of Portman. Under his direction, she played Nina with a high-pitched, girly voice. Reportedly, Portman wasn't happy about this. Past directors have criticised her for her natural voice being too girly. Having worked hard to lose it, she felt playing Nina was very regressive. 

I understand that she is supposed to be a naturally timid character, but giving her such a girly voice made her quite infantalising. Surely there could have been other ways to portray this. And I would argue this was more of a problem with Aronofsky's direction than Portman's acting.

And a quick shoutout to Vincent Cassel who played the sleazy, borderline abusive Thomas Leroy to a tee. He was an ugly, villainous character.

Nina declared her final performance as being perfect. I wouldn't apply the same praise to Black Swan, but it was one of the scariest non-horror films that I've seen.

Black Hawk Down review

 Number 571 on the top 1000 films of all time is Ridley Scott's 2001 war film 'Black Hawk Down.'

Based on true events, Black Hawk Down is set during the Somalian civil war. A group of American soldiers are sent to extract the top lieutenants of the Somalian dictator Mohamed Farrah Aidad from the capital Mogadishu. But the extraction goes wrong and the soldiers are left fighting for their lives. The massive ensemble cast includes Josh Hartnett, Ewan Macgregor, Ewen Bremner, Eric Bana, Ioan Gruffard, Orlando Bloom and Tom Hardy.

The problem with war films is that the characters always look the same. It is so difficult to tell them apart. Obviously, that comes with the territory, but other films and directors have done a much better job in distinguishing them than Ridley Scott does. True, he did choose to write the character's names on their helmets, but it was still difficult to tell who was who. Part of that was down to the sprawling cast, but also a lack of a clear protagonist.

Josh Hartnett received star billing, so I guess he was the main character, but there were so many other characters with so many storylines that they were all overshadowed by one another. They were all fighting to be noticed, but they all failed dreadfully. And that led to an overlong, bloated film which lost narrative direction. At times, it seemed like Ridley completely forgot about some of his characters and plot points.

Orlando Bloom plays raw recruit Todd Blackburn who is desperate to start fighting. He is due to drop into the city, but when his helicopter has to dodge an RPG, he tumbles to the ground below. A massive effort is made to rescue him, but what happens after isn't focussed on at all. Another soldier Michael Durant (Ron Eldard) is captured by the Somalians. Yet we only find out through a line of exposition at the film's end that he was released after ten days. Hell, the whole point of the mission was to capture Aidad's lieutenants and bring them out safely. But even this central plot point was left by the wayside. Ridley Scott set up so many storylines, but he forgot to finish them satisfactorily.

Instead any storyline takes a backseat to the action. Due to the army's mantra of leaving no man behind, the soldiers aim to rescue every single one of their fallen comrades (except for Durant who was mostly forgotten about) this includes the troopers inside the Black Hawk helicopters which are downed by RPGs. Yet the rescue effort goes awry as the soldiers quickly find themselves overnumbered. Cue endless gunfights and explosions. The action is fast, frenetic and chaotic. It doesn't let you catch your breath, so you're left blankly watching the screen asking 'what the hell is going on?' Ridley Scott was obsessed in creating a spectacle, he forgot to include any story.

Black Hawk Down was also criticised for its portrayal of the Somalian population. I would echo this criticism. The Somalians were generic, two-dimensional villains with no depth or clear motivations. I'm sure if Ridley wasn't so concerned with the gunfights he could have created a memorable villain, but he didn't.

*Spoilers* the film ends with a group of a soldiers running to safety from the crash site to a safe zone - something that has retrospectively been called the Mogadishu mile. They all make it safely. I know this was based on real life, but I found it hard to believe that the Somalians allowed them to do this in peace.

It's hard to believe this is the same man who created Alien - a masterpiece of horror and science-fiction. But Black Hawk Down was certainly no masterpiece. It was an overlong, monotonous affair with too many characters and paper-thin villains.

Black Dynamite review

 Number 938 on the top 1000 films of all time is this parody of 1970's Blaxpolitation genre: Black Dynamite.

Black Dynamite (Michael Jai White) is a former CIA agent and Kung Fu Master. After his brother is killed by a shady organisation, Black Dynamite soon discovers a deeper conspiracy.

There is a fair share of bad parodies out there, but Black Dynamite is not one of them. While I'm not particularly familiar with the Blaxploitation genre, I've watched my fair share of 70's films, and black Dynamite lampooned these tropes wonderfully from the vivid colour scheme to the massive hair to the main character's name being sung out at pivotal moments to the silly kung-fu sequences.

Instead of being a string of bad jokes and inane, pop culture references, Scott Sanders', Byron Minns' and Michael Jai White's, who wrote as well as starred, script produced some genuine laughs. I loved the boom mic appearing in shots or the characters reading out their stage directions. But my favourite gag was the spoofing of the insta-love that happened between Black Dynamite and his love interest Gloria Gray (Salli Richardson.) Over the course of a few minutes and a walk in the park, they are enamoured with one another. As far as film cliches go, this can be one of the worst. It was great to see it parodied here.

Sure you can argue that the plot is absurd. Black Dynamite's quest for the truth takes him all the way from Kung-Fu island to the White House - and the characters are all racial stereotypes, but that's supposed to be the point. Inevitably, not all the jokes land and some of them are crude and vulgar, but nevertheless, this is a brilliant comedy that will have you rolling in the aisles.   

Precious review

 Number 894 on the top 1000 films of all time is Lee Daniels' 2009 drama film 'Precious.'

Claireece 'Precious' Jones (Gabourey Sidibe) is an overweight, illiterate, black sixteen-year-old trying to survive in Harlem. Bullied at school and subjected to horrific abuse from her mother Mary Lee, (Mo'nique) her life is a miserable one. Upon falling pregnant again, she starts to attend an 'alternative' school, where she sees a way to escape her old life.

Word of warning, Precious is not a pretty film. It is raw, gritty and unapologetic. It grabs you by the throat and refuses to be shaken free. Showcasing the horrors of an abusive household, it's difficult to not flinch away at times. But none of this violence ever felt gratuitous. Unfortunately, this is the sad reality for many youths across the US and it's a reality that shall not be ignored. 

Also, could you believe this was Gabourey Sidibe's first acting role. The character of Precious was cast an open audition and Sidibe was selected despite having no prior acting experience. Precious is not an easy character to play - she carries the sexual trauma of being molested, raped and impregnated by her father. Not to mention, the terrible abuse she receives from her mother. But Sidibe was great in the role. She provided Precious with a humanity and a vulnerability. But she wasn't pathetic nor a character you pity. 

Upon attending the 'alternative' school and through the close tutelage of teacher Miss Blu Rain, (Paula Patton) Precious starts to learn how to read and write. As her literacy improves, so does her self-confidence. With a lot of troubled kids, all it takes is somebody to believe in them and that somebody can be a brilliant teacher like Miss Blu Rain.

Lee Daniels balanced the humour and heartbreak well. As a means of escapism, Precious imagines herself in a number of fantasy scenarios from singing in a gospel choir to performing on stage as a soul-singer. But the funniest had to be when she imagines her and her mother in an old black-and-white Italian film. Watch the scene at 3.30. These little fantasies, other than providing some much needed relief, also balanced the dark with some light. They were also a little sad - Precious was imagining a life, that to her, would always seem out of reach.

Mo'nique won the Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her role as the villainous Mary Lee and I can understand why. It was an absolutely brutal role and she did it well. Jealous that her boyfriend took more interest in his daughter than her, she takes out her frustrations on Precious. As Precious is financially dependent on her, she can't up-and-leave, as is the case for many abusive relationships. But 

Lastly, a quick shoutout to Mariah Carey who played Precious' social worker, Miss Weiss. All made-down, she was utterly unrecognisable. A last-minute substitute for Helen Mirren, she did the role justice.

This was a really good film. It will make you laugh and it will stay with you long after the credits have rolled. It might just be too brutal for a rewatch.

Black Cat, White Cat Review

 Number 179 on the top 1000 films of all time is the Serbian black comedy drama Black Cat, White Cat.

Matko (Bajram Severdzan) is a small-time Romani crook who is down on his luck. He plots to rob a train with the help of hedonistic gangster Dadan (Srdan Todorovic.) But the duplicitous Dadan double-crosses Matko and takes the goods for himself. To help Matko pay off his debts, he convinces him to allow his son to marry Dadan's sister.

Black Cat, White struck me as being Serbia's answer to the classic crime caper a la Snatch or the Sting. We have Matko as the lovable roguish protagonist who must pull a feat of daring do to get him out of a spot of bother. There's Dadan as the over-the-top gangster - a touch too over the top I would argue, there was a lot of gratuitous cocaine use and fooling around with prostitutes, and even a cute love story between Matko's son and the local barmaid. There is plenty of physical comedy especially at the end when Dadan is tricked into falling into the local manure. And also lots of hammy violence like the during the heist sequence when Dadan shoots dead a witness.

Despite all this, I did find the film hard to follow. I'm obviously not from the Balkans so I had to watch the film with English subtitles, meaning I missed anything that didn't translate. But I also don't know enough of the different Balkan cultures so a lot o the cultural references passed me by - the wedding sequence, a vital element of the film was lost on me. But even more bizarrely, there was a very strange scene where a lady squeezed and picked up a nail with her ample derriere. Perhaps if I was of Balkan persuasion I might have understood this.

Although I could see what the film was trying to do, I couldn't follow it at all. It wasn't for me.