The Ersatz Elevator Review

The Bad Beginning Review

The Reptile Room Review

The Wide Window Review

The Miserable Mill Review

The Austere Academy review

Dear reader,

if you think this review will be of a happy tale in the lives of the Baudelaire orphans, then your thoughts will be just as ersatz as the elevator, in the building where they live.  For the Baudelaire have few happy moments in their lives.  This particular installment of the Baudelaires' lives is especially distressing, involving treachery, lies and far too much salmon.  While, like a ghost, I am forever imprisoned in writing these reviews, you are not obligated to read them.  I beg you please don't.  Leave my blog where it belongs, at the bottom of Search Engine rankings.

Within the Baudelaire's last misadventure, we saw them attend Prufock Prepatory Academy, a horrible boarding school.  There they find new friends in the Quagmire triplets, Duncan and Isadora, the two survivors of a fire which killed their killed parents and brother, Quigley.  However, they are then kidnapped by Count Olaf.


The Ersatz Elevator picks up where this chapter ended.  Hapless banker, Mr Poe, who is in charge of the Baudelaires, delivers them to their new guardians, Jerome and Esme Squalor who live in 667 Dark Avenue, within a particularly fashionable and wealthy area.


And just like how the Austere Academy crudely parodied, the education system, the Ersatz Elevator is a satirical parody of mindless materialism.  Esme Squalor is a complete narcissist who cares far more about her own wealth and public image, than the Baudelaires.  A common motif in this episode is whether something is "in," or "out," that is to say, whether something is in-fashion or out.  Aqueous Martinis, pinstripe suits and stairs are in.  While Esme couldn't care less about the Baudelaires, Jerome loves the Baudelaires dearly.  However, he also doesn't like to argue with people and is constantly hen-pecked by his wife.

Tony Hale and Lucy Punch were both great as Jerome and Esme Squalor, respectively.  Esme's pure callousness and obsession with wealth worked in well with the tone of the episode and provided a lot of the humour.  And Tony Hale was charming as the helpful, but incompetent Jerome Squalor.

One criticism I had of the Austere Academy is that it showed Count Olaf early in the episode out of his disguise.  This then removed from the shock, we were supposed to see when he appeared at the episode's conclusion within his costume that of course fooled everyone.The Ersatz Elevator fixed this by having Count Olaf appear in the Squalor's penthouse apartment in his disguise of fashionable auctioneer Gunter, complete with a monacle and a dreadful foreign accent.  Which accent? Well, the accent of the far away land of Far Away.  And Gunter's purpose is to arbitrate the In Auction happening at Veblen Hall.  Count Olaf fools both the Squalors, but of course, the Baudelaires see right through his disguise.

They suspect that since he is close by, so are the Quagmires and so they search the Squalors' ridiculously lavish apartment for any sign, but without any success.  From here, the Baudelaires and Squalors then go out to dinner in the Innest restaurant in town: Herring Houdini, which is a fake restaurant ran by Count Olaf's henchmen.

Another thing I haven't liked about the last few episodes is how the henchmen feel misused.  Either they're completely overused like Olaf or they're underused, but I felt this episode found the right balance.  Although they provide a lot of the show's humour separately, they're at their absolute best when they're together.  Their constant bumbling and blunders is always entertaining to watch.

Speaking of blunders, they make a mistake by serving Esme and co, alcoholic Vodka Martinis,
And discussing waiters, we are reintroduced to Larry-the-Waiter and Mr Poe's secretary Jacquelyn, two adults part of the same organisation as the Baudelaire's parents, who are determined to help the Baudelaires any opportunity they can.  When Olaf spots these two, he tries to make a quick get-away, but is held back by Larry-the-Waiter who has grown in confidence since we first saw him.

Larry-the-Waiter and Jacquelyn then try to buy the Baudelaires time to sneak away and continue their search for the Quagmires.  They do this by demanding that Olaf sing a song.  Although Zack Handlen of the AV Club accused this section of being irrelevant and self-indulgent, I don't agree.  It was entertaining and gave Neil Patrick Harris a chance to show off his musical theatre talents.  It was also in line with the tone of the episode.  The style of the singing was very reminiscent of the jazz clubs of the Roaring Twenties, where wealth was abundant.

But it also gave the Baudelaires enough time to return to 667 Dark Avenue and discover the Quagmires in a cage at the bottom of a false or Ersatz Elevator shaft.  And the five orphans all live happily ever after.

Wait.  No.  That's not how this works at all.  But before we explore how things all go wrong for the Baudelaires in the second episode, let's briefly discuss a subplot of the first episode.  This subplot picks up on a character from the Austere Academy - the school librarian who tries to help the Baudelaires.
The librarian is called Olivia Caliban, who book-readers know is an important character, and she connects up with the dashing and brave Jacques Snicket, played by the dashing and brave Nathan Fillion.  They are also working together to find the Quagmires, although they have little success in doing so.  It is revealed that Jacques Snicket is also part of this mysterious organisation and he helps to bring Olivia Caliban up to speed.

Anyway, onto the second episode.  While the Baudelaires have found the Quagmires, they are unable to break them free from their cage, so the Baudelaires return back to the Penthouse Apartment, where they find none other than Esme Squalor.

Realising they have few others options, they ask her for help and tell her the truth about everything.  She seemingly agrees to help them, before pushing them down the empty elevator shaft.  Some god-awful CGI later, the Baudelaires fall and fall into a net suspended within the shaft.  It is then revealed that Esme has been in cahoots with Count Olaf all along.  Esme and Count Olaf have a shared past and she has been helping him to catch the Baudelaires and the Quagmires.

This plot twist is one that makes perfect sense.  We know that Esme Squalor is the epitome of narcissism.  All she cares about is material wealth, and so it is perfectly logical that she would want the Baudelaire's and Quagmire's fortunes all for herself.

Although the Baudelaires seem trapped in the net, Sunny Baudelaire uses her teeth to help her climb up the elevator shaft and back into the penthouse apartment to find something to help her siblings.  Meanwhile, Olaf and Esme thinking they've succeeded then do some celebratory dancing.  While I didn't think the musical number in the first episode was self-indulgent, I definitely think that this was.  It was completely irrelevant and didn't add at all to the plot.  It was just more of an excuse for Neil Patrick Harris and Lucy Punch to be silly.

But, Sunny finds a rope which she uses to return to her siblings and then help them climb to the bottom of the elevator shaft, where they discover that the Quagmires are gone, presumably taken by Count Olaf's henchmen.  This is particularly frustrating for the Baudelaires, as the Quagmires never had the chance to tell them what they've learned about the mysterious organisation VFD or about its spyglass insginia.  However, before they were taken, the Quagmires did have the chance to tell the Baudelaires that Gunter plans to auction them off, disguised in a lot within the In auction.

The Baudelaires discover a mysterious tunnel leading away from the elevator shaft, which leads to the burnt ruins of the Baudelaires' home.  The orphans peer out of a trapdoor where they see a man with a tattoo of an eye on his ankle.  Presuming its Count Olaf, they quickly hide.  However, we then see that it is actually Jacques Snicket, which made the plot thicken.  Were Jacques Snicket and Count Olaf once comrades working together in the same organisation? Furthermore, some dialogue between Snicket and Olivia reveals that a sugar bowl was once stolen from Esme Squalor.  Book-readers know this is an important plot point.

Once they have steeled themselves, the Baudelaires leave the trapdoor and enter the ruins of the Baudelaire mansion.  This was a suitably touching moment, as we see the orphans trying to keep their composure.  However, their love for the Quagmires, sees them marching forward.  Fortunately, they meet Mr Poe who is also on his way to the In Auction.

The Baudelaires suspect that Olaf is hiding the Quagmires in the mysterious Lot 49 - a giant box labelled VFD.  This then starts a hilariously farcical bidding wars, as everybody tries outbidding each other to win the lot.  This includes the Baudelaires, Mr Poe, Count Olaf's henchmen, Count Olaf himself, Jacques Snicket and even a newly brave Jerome Squalor.  The Baudelaires win the lot and rip open the box, only to find it full of Very Fancy Dollies.

It's revealed that the VFD box was a red herring and the Quagmires were hidden in a statue of a literal red herring.  Just as Count Olaf is unveiled and it seems like he's going to get caught, Veblen Hall becomes Out and in the chaos, Olaf, Esme, who proclaims Olaf as her new boyfriend, and all of his henchmen escape.

The Baudelaires are prepared to chase after them, but Jerome Squalor stops him claiming it is too dangerous.  They beg him to help them, but he lacks the courage to do so and thus refuses to be their guardian any longer.  Mr Poe then takes the Baudelaires to their next guardian, a village called VFD, although their desire to rescue the Quagmires is as strong as ever.

And in hot pursuit are the four adults intent on helping the Baudelaires: Jacquelyn, Larry-the-Waiter, Olivia Caliban and Jacques Snicket.  But knowing a Series of Unfortunate Events, I'm not sure whether all of these characters will get happy endings.

All in all, this was another enjoyable edition of a Series of Unfortunate Events.  While the meta-humour and Lemony Snicket's dire wishes for us to stop watching, it is still greatly watchable.  The set production, design and the humour is on point and I looked forward to the next edition: The Vile Village.

VFD and Cultural References:


1. Virulently Fishy Decor
2.Vigorously Fancy Dining
3. Very Fancy Doilles
4. One of the bidders at the auction is called Fellini, named after a famous Italian film director
5. Veblen Hall is out in favour of the in Milton Friedman Hall.  Milton Friedman is a famous economist who won the 1976 Nobel Memorial Prize.

The Bridge on the River Kwai review

Number 131 on the top 1000 films of all time is the film that earned Alec Guiness, the Best Actor Oscar: The Bridge on the River Kwai.

Set in a WW2 Japanese POW camp, Colonel Nicholson (Alec Guiness) is the leader of a group of British prisoners.  When the camp commandant, Colonel Saito, (Sessue Hayakama) orders the British to build a strategically important bridge, the British slack and sabotage the project.  That is, until Colonel Nicholson tells them to start building the bridge properly, so that the completed bridge can serve as a symbol of British superiority. 

Meanwhile, the American, Major Shears (William Holden) escapes the same POW camp only to stumble upon a British squadron tasked with destroying the very bridge that Colonel Nicholson is building.

I really enjoyed this film, I found it very watchable.  It was interesting, as I felt that it focussed on a section of WW2, which is often overlooked: the war in Japan.  Of all of the WW2 films I have seen since I began this challenge: Saving Private Ryan, Downfall and Das Boot, only focussed on Nazi Germany.  I found it engaging to watch a film on a subject that I don't know all that much about.

Alec Guiness was great as Colonel Nicholson - a man whose greatest flaw is his commitment to his ideals.  When Colonel Saito orders Nicholson's men to build the bridge, he also orders Nicholson's officers to join the workforce.  However, as Nicholson points out doing so is a direct infraction of the Geneva convention.  Nicholson so staunchly defies Saito's orders that he is prepared to be beaten and imprisoned in an airless, metal shack.

But then as Nicholson becomes more obsessed with completing the bridge, he is prepared to use whatever resources necessary.  This includes his officers and even those men recovering in hospital.  To some extent, he could be considered more villainous than Saito, as at least the latter remains loyal to himself.  However, Nicholson is prepared to compromise his principles in favour of his pride.  But this is what made him a complicated character and therefore an interesting and compelling one.

Less compelling was the narrative following Major Shears.  While this raised the same questions about morality, for example, sacrificing one man for the group, I didn't find it as interesting.  I was so engrossed in the Nicholson storyline that everytime it jumped to Shears, I was taken out of the film.  I did enjoy this narrative and I thought Holden gave a good performance as reluctant hero Shears, but I just didn't find it as entertaining as the Nicholson narrative.

Lastly, the cinematography was just superb.  Filmed in Sri Lanka, the film had an appropriate feel  Some of the landscape shots of the river were just gorgeous.

Ultimately, despite my gripes about the Shears subplot, I did really enjoy this film.  Alec Guiness was great, it was mostly compelling throughout, and despite being 2 and a half hours long, the narrative never dragged.  And best of all, it's prompted me to start learning more about the Pacific theatre of WW2.  And when a film leaves you wanting more, you know it's doing something right.

The Austere Academy review

The Bad Beginning Review

The Reptile Room Review

The Wide Window Review

The Miserable Mill Review

Dear Reader,

I am sorry that you have returned to my blog.  Not because I do not value your company, but because you have been mislead into thinking that the Baudelaire situation has improved. It has not. Even a year on, they are still having the most miserable of experiences, with this latest installment including bullies, bad violin playing and terrible cafeteria food.  While it is my solemn duty to continue to review A Series of Unfortunate Events, you must have happier things to do, such as attending funerals.

A year has passed and season 2 of A Series of Unfortunate Events has just been broadcast on Netflix.  It continues the story of the Baudelaire children - Violet, Klaus and Sunny, three orphans who have lost their parents in a terrible fire.  They are relentless pursued by Count Olaf (Neil Patrick Harris) who wants the fortune their parents left behind.  Based on the Lemony Snicket's YA book series, it is narrated by Lemony Snicket himself (Patrick Warburton.) Misadventure after misadventure sees the Baudelaires go to an eccentric reptologist to a woman who is afraid of everything to working in a lumbermill, to, in this installment, a boarding school.

After a recap of last season, we see the Baudelaires meet the Vice Principal of Prufock Prepatory School, Nero (Roger Bart), an unhinged and incompetent man, who cares more about his violin playing more than the welfare of his students.  And for the record he is an awful violinist.  Complimenting his bumbling incompetence is the malicious bully Carmelita Spats (Kitana Turnbull) She is a spoilt, arrogant brat who torments the Baudelaires any chance she can.  And to make matters worse, the Baudelaires are forced to live in a tin shack, complete with snapping crabs and dripping fungus.  And then Count Olaf finds them again, disguised as a gym coach, ready to start hatching his next evil plot to steal their fortune.

However, things aren't all bad for the Baudelaires.  They soon befriend fellow pupils and triplets, Duncan and Isadora Quagmire, the only two survivors from a fire that killed their parents and brother, Quigley.  The Baudelaires are also helped by the school librarian and by the mysterious, Larry the Waiter, and Mr Poe's (a banker who is responsible for the Baudelaire orphans) secretary Jacuelyn.  Finally we are also introduced to the equally enigmatic Jacques Snicket, played by Nathan Fillion.  Book-readers know that Jaques Snicket is an important character within the books.

The setting for the Austere Academy was great.  In classic Snicket style, it is a blatant satire/parody of the current education institutions that run our lives.  Rather than actually teaching anything useful. the teachers force their students just to memorise and regurgitate information.  Vice Principal Nero is a tyrannical, but hapless bureaucrat, although not as cruel as his Roman namesake, and the library, a place of learning, is only allowed to be open for ten minutes a day.  Moreover, Carmelita Spats is your classic bully with her own cheering fan squad.  Finally, the school has a crumbling infrastructure with funds being constantly misappropriated.

While the parallels between The Austere Academy and real life were well-realised and delightful to watch, I do feel that the overall execution of the two-parter was lacking.  As Zack Handlen of AV Club notices, the first episode is largely just set-up, while that's obviously important, it can't come before the plot.  And that's what happens here.  Within the book, just as the Baudelaires feel they're safe from Count Olaf, he appears in disguise, ready to steal their fortune.

However, within this episode, we first see Count Olaf and his henchmen within the first half hour of the episode.  Rather than lurking in the background, they're placed front and centre.  They commandeer a Prufock Prep school bus, which is carrying the school's sport team home from an away game.  While, we always know that Count Olaf will appear, the excitement is in wondering when this will be.  It is much more satisfying to see his first entrance, being in a costume that falls everyone, rather than in the first twenty minutes.  It removes a lot of the dramatic tension.

On another note, I was also disappointed with the use of Olaf's henchmen.  While they have always functioned as comic-relief, I do feel they were underused, with some being reduced to wearing silly costumes for no reason.  There were definitely funny moments, such as the Hook-Handed man being afraid of the dark or the continued philosophisings of the henchman who looks neither like a man or a woman, but these were few and far between.

At the end of the first episode, Count Olaf reveals himself to the Baudelaires in his ridiculous gym coach disguise.  However, the effect of this was diluted, because of how he had already appeared earlier.  His reveal here would have been more powerful if it had been his only appearance in the episode.  Yet the narrative really gets going in the second episode, as the Baudelaires try to discover and foil Count Olaf's plot.  This plot is revealed to be Count Olaf making the Baudelaires run laps all night, so that they become too tired to concentrate in class and, thus, flunk their exams.  If that happens, then they will be expelled and sent to Olaf under the pretense of him home-schooling them.

Fortunately, the Quagmires save the day be running laps disguised as the Baudelaires, allowing the real Baudelaires to study for and pass their tests.  However, Count Olaf discovers the truth and kidnaps the Quagmires, before escaping.  The Quagmires were a nice addition to the story, acting as parallels to the Baudelaires and the child actors all worked well together.

Alongside this main plot, were two supplementary subplots, the first being the Baudelaires trying to discover more about the mysterious past of their parents.  It is revealed that the Baudelaire parents were members of a secret organisation who spoke in special codes and used spyglasses.  The Baudelaires then find out that the Quagmires' parents are part of the same organisation and together they try to discover the truth.  Meanwhile, Jacquelyn and Larry the Waiter are trying to help the Baudelaires by delivering them a book which will answer all of their questions. 

Both of these subplots play out very differently in the books and they work to a varying extent in the TV series.  The Baudelaires investigating into their parents' past is an enjoyable new addition, adding in some increased tension.  However, I'm not too keen on Jacquelyn and Larry.  It is is revealed that they had a shared past with Count Olaf and the Baudelaire's parents, but this has always remained a little too mysterious for my liking.  It has a raised a lot of questions and not too many answers.  Although, it is only halfway through.  I'm sure their significance will be explained later on...just like how I'm sure the Baudelaires' situation will definitely improve and they'll live happily ever after...oh wait, it's not that kind of story.

VFD and Cultural References

1. Victoriously Final Days is the only VFD reference I spotted here.
2. Count Olaf calls Vice Principal Nero, Caligula at one point.
3. Carmelita Spats and Larry the Waiter quote Wannabe by the Spice Girls.
4. The famous poet Ogden Nash is discussed by Klaus and Isadora.

The Seventh Seal Review

Number 130 on the top 1000 films of all time is Ingmar Bergman's 1957 epic historical fantasy, The Seventh Seal.

Antonius Block (Max Von Sydow) is a Swedish knight returning from the Crusades.  Upon his return, he is approached by a personification of Death, who tells him that his time has come.  To forestall his judgement, Block challenges Death to a game of chess.  And during the game, Block finds ways to help others come to terms with their final judgements.

Along with Wild Strawberries, the Seventh Seal is regarded as one of Bergman's finest films.  In fact, it has become a classic of both Swedish and World cinema.  And I feel that it is naturally a film that would appeal more to critics than to general audiences.  Like a scholarly text, while it will have a general audience, it would have a greater appeal to scholars and film enthusiasts.

Perhaps this is because of how intellectualised the content is.  it engages with profound topics, most prominently our relationship with death.  And it does this well, with the game of chess functioning as our entrance into this world.  It is closer to a plot device than anything else, but it s a plot device that works, with the white and black colours of chess being metaphors for life and death.  Although, I'm not sure whether the chess game featured enough for this metaphor to be apparent enough.  The film jumped around a bit, thus diluting the importance of the game of chess.

Nevertheless, this was an enjoyable film, which raises important points about our relationship with death.  Alas, I am just not intelligent enough to fully appreciate it.

Hunted Season 3 Finale

After five long weeks, we have reached the finale of season 3 of Hunted.  With only three days left, will any of the remaining four fugitives win the show?

Last episode ended with Joe and Dan live-streaming a gig in a pub on Facebook, as a way of provoking the Hunters.  The provocation works and the Hunters send a ground team to catch the pair.  however, by the time, the Hunters reach the pub, Joe and Dan have a long gone.  The Hunters try bribing the patrons of the pub to give up information, but the patrons take the piss instead.

The next we see of Joe and Dan, they're in Burton Flemying, North Yorkshire and they have received a USB stick, which gives them information about their extraction point.  They plug it in at an internet cafe and discover their extraction point is a boat on the Greenway Quay, along the River Dart in South Devon.  They also find out that using the USB stick has automatically alerted the Hunters to their location, but not the location of the extraction point.

Joe and Dan then meet a contact who lets them borrow his car.  However, first, Joe and Dan walk around Yorkshire, carrying their bike helmets to make the Hunters think they're travelling by bike.

Unfortunately, the Hunters suspect this is a ruse, because of how Joe is wearing the most Yorkshire thing ever, a flat-cap.  But the ruse works long enough for Joe and Dan to drive within 40 miles of South Devon, where they commit to cycling the rest of the way.  From there, we next see them in Chudleigh, Devon and they actually cycle past Bob, but they wisely decide not to make contact.

Now onto Bob Ayling.  He originally began this process with his son Alex, whom we'll come to soon, but the pair split up to double their chances.

However, without Alex, Bob has become utterly lost.  We see his morale drop and he becomes exhausted.  yet he is still dedicated to his son.  Bob regularly admits his failings as a father and he wants nothing more to atone for them now.  This made me root for him.  He's a favourite of mine to win.

We see Bob is in Chiddingstone, kent.  When he receives the USB stick, he goes to the town hall to access it.  When he realises he needs to scarpers, one of the town clerks agrees to drive him to a contact who can help further.  The Hunters quickly discover Bob's location and send a team there, but the town hall staff do little to help them.

So instead, they begin tracking mobile phone activity in the area and they quickly identify the phone of a Sue Hewlett - the same Sue Hewlett who has just dropped Ben off with her contact.

The Hunters contact Sue and when it emerges she won't help them, the Hunters then begin playing dirty.  They tell her that Bob made up a story about Alex, as a way of gaining sympathy, so that he can win the show and use the prize money for pay for his divorce.  This tactic caused online outrage, and while I agree, it was below-the-belt, this was only because we've grown to love Bob so much.  We know he is a decent, hard-working man.  If Bob was a criminal, we wouldn't be so forgiving.

Anyway, Sue unfortunately believes the Hunters and tells that Bob is now on the edge of East Sussex.  The Hunters again start tracking mobile phones in the area and quickly identify the phone of the man who is helping Bob.  At the same time, they launch a social media campaign, appealing to the public for information.  This works and Bob begins to get ratted out, helping the Hunters to pinpoint his location.

We next see Bob in Chudleigh, Devon, only a day away from winning.  However, he is becoming lost and frustrated, as well as being caught on multiple CCTV cameras.  To make matters worse, he then suffers from a knee injury and decides to pitch camp for the night in a field.

Believing they're close, the Hunters send up a drone with a thermal imaging sensor, which quickly picks up a heat signature.  The Hunters go to investigate, but it turns out to be a Farmhand.  Then it begins raining and the Drone has to be taken down.  I have been glad to see that good old British rain.

Finally, we come to Alex, who has captured the hearts of the nation, due to his courage, earnestness and general likeability.  Having been diagnosed with Aspergers at a young age, he has always had low self-confidence and has entered the process to prove something.  And that is why Alex is my favourite to win.

We find out that Alex is in Reigate, Surrey and he asks in an office to access the USB stick.  once he discovers the location, he plans his getaway by bravely asking for help from the public.  A strange woman agrees saying that she'll help as long as Alex doesn't have a bomb in his bomb.  In typical Alex honesty, he replies "I don't have a bomb.  Only 9 days' worth of clothes, rice crispie bars and an unopen bag of sweets."

Alex is driven to safety, but not before he throws the details of the extraction point down a drain, proudly proclaiming that the Hunters will never find them there.  A crucial mistake at this point in the process.  Especially since the Hunters know Alex's location and see him on CCTV doing just that.  They send a team to the drain to fish out the details, but it emerges that this was an all elaborate hoax, set by Alex.  It was all a ruse to buy him time to escape.  It fooled the Hunters and it definitely fooled me.  I'm sorry Alex, I should have never doubted you. 

To think this was the same Alex who only a few weeks ago, in a phone call to his mum, told her his exact location and how to get there.  He's come a long way and all credit to him.  This was a good plan.  After Alex leaves his first contact, he befriends a woman named Nadine who agrees to take him to Torquay.  And we see him beginning to recognise his own self-worth.  He proudly proclaims "that the women love me and he loves the women," which was the cutest thing ever.

From here, we jump to 7 hours to the extraction time.  After having seen Joe and Dan on CCTV in Devon, where Bob is, the Hunters conclude the extraction point is in Devon.  When they begin analysing the fugitives' movements, they realise that they're all heading south.  The Hunters realise that the River Dart is a natural extraction point, but with twenty-five jetties, they have no choice to search them all.

With all of the fugitives within spitting distance, Bob is the closest.  We jump to 30 mins to the extraction time and I admit, that I was feeling the tension.  I was screaming at my laptop, praying that nobody would be caught.  Bob has a bad night in his tent, but his resolve to win is as strong as ever.  He begins marching through the woods to the Greenway Quay, but then the Hunters send a chopper up, stopping Bob in his tracks.  Thankfully, it rains again, and Bob remains undetected.  With 15 mins to the extraction time, he starts running.

Meanwhile, Alex is also being driven to the extraction point by Nadine.  He's driven, as close as possible, before he begins running.  While running, he and Bob reunite.  While this was a heart-warming, tear-jerking reunion, I was screaming at my laptop, as I was so scared that they would be caught here.

But luckily, they begin running again, but unluckily, the chopper spots them and the Hunters send all of their ground teams to Greenway Quay.  However, the Hunters screw up by going to the wrong side of the river, which is what happened last year, strangely enough.  This mistake is enough time for Alex and Bob to successfully reach the extraction point.  I'm so glad that the two of them won.  They are a lovely pair and they definitely deserve it.

But it's not over yet.  Joe and Dan are also on their way to the observation point, closely pursued by the only ground team who didn't screw up.  Meanwhile, the Hunters on the wrong bank are trying to commander a boat to the other side.  Joe and Dan reach the quay and board the boat, narrowly missing the Hunters. 

Four fugitives take home a share of £100,00 and Bob proudly announces by winning this show, Alex was proven all of his bullies and doubters wrong, which he definitely has.  But all credit to Bob too.  There were moments where I thought he was going to give up, but he stuck in there and all credit to him too.

Congrats to Joe and Dan as well.  Although I don't feel that the series focussed on them, as much, as it could have done, the two also deserved to win.  Live-streaming on Facebook was a risky move, but it paid off, and left the Hunters with a lot of egg on their faces.  Talking of egg on faces, 4 fugitives escaped the Hunters this year, with one of two of them being complete underdogs.

It is interesting how the fugitives you expect to win crush out early.  In season 1, I thought Ricy Allen was a surefire winner, before he gave up.  In S2, two ex-soldiers, Kirk Bowett and Jez Scarrett, were caught after becoming complacent.  And this season, ex-copper, Jamie Clark, was caught after taking one risk too many.  But then this allowed underdogs Nick Cummings and Alex Ayling to win, so I can't complain really.

With season 4 of Hunted being broadcast later this year, we will soon go through this process all over again.  While I doubt my little blog is big enough for the Hunters to care about, don't tell me your plan in the comments.  You never know who's reading.

Hunted Season 3 Episode 5 Recap

There are five fugitives left who need to escape capture for another 6 days.  Will any of them be able to evade the Hunters?

Last episode ended on Majid, the Deputy Mayor of Sheffield, being pursued by the Hunters after a bolshy return to Sheffield.  Being driven by an accomplice, he desperately tries to escape into the Peak District.  However, his getaway driver takes a wrong turn and Majid makes a break for it, running through the countryside.  But it doesn't take long before the Hunters catch him.

From here we go to father and son team, Bob and Alex Ayling.  Last episode, after 18 days on the run, the two decided to split up, to double their chances.  Bob is still in his home county of Kent and is clearly suffering from the stress of being on the run.  His poor physical condition is only exemplified from his lack of sleep and food.  We begin to see a defeated man.

But we also a man utterly dedicated to his son.  He wants nothing more than for Alex to win the show, even if he doesn't.

Hiding in Pluckley, Kent, Bob begins to make mistakes, such as walking in full view of a CCTV camera, which strangely isn't even mentioned by the Hunters.  Becoming intensely paranoid, he hitches a lift with a delivery driver who offers to drive him to Newcastle-upon-Tyne in a couple of days.

Yet Bob's paranoia grows so much that eh calls the delivery driver on a burner phone to see if he can get an earlier lift to safety.  But he runs out of luck.  And to make matters worse, the Hunters have tracked the call, showing that even burner phones aren't safe.  They then decide to target the delivery driver who helped him, who reveals everything, including, most notably, that Alex and Bob have separated.

Although Bob remains uncaught, I'm unsure whether he'll make the full 25 days.  He may give up long before then.

Now we move onto his son, Alex.  At 2 years old, Alex was diagnosed with Asperger's, which has left him shy, awkward and insular.  In Sandhurst, Kent, he becomes badly lost, as he tries to navigate his way to Hastings to meet his mother, Lynne.

The Hunters also identify their close relationship and decide to focus their efforts onto Lynne.  While they question her in the Hunter HQ, a covert team installs cameras in and around her home.  Later, the cameras spot a seemingly strange woman leaving Lynne's home and entering a seemingly strange car.

The audience discovers that this is Lynne in disguise who is able to rendeyvous with Alex and give him supplies and a much-needed confidence boost.

Meanwhile, the Hunters have identified that the car belongs to one of Lynne's friends, Tracy Gough.  The Hunters interview her and halfway through, bizarrely, her husband talks about a previously unknown sim card.  I initially wondered whether this was a trap of some kind, but I'm wondering whether this was just a monumental cock-up.

Alex is still in Kent and he bravely asks help from a stranger who puts him up for the night.  Alex is overjoyed that he had the confidence to do this and I was too.  He speaks openly about how he was bullied, because of his Asperger's, and so it was great to see him develop like this.

Lastly, we came to best friends, milk men and singers, Joe and Dan, who hitherto haven't been on anybody's radar, least of all the Hunters'.  The show hasn't been focussing much on them, so it was a surprise to learn they were hiding in North Wales.

But having become increasingly homesick, they decide to return home to Preston, Lancashire.  Suspecting this could happen, the Hunters interview Dan's wife and install spyware on his computer.  While doing so, they discover Dan has pre-recorded 25 bedtime story videos for his kids.  Deciding to exploit this, the Hunters make a crude parody in order to provoke Dan and Joke into making a mistake.

Meanwhile, Joe and Dan are being harboured by their friend in the Eaves Pub.  They see the Hunters' video and immediately begin plotting revenge.

They decide to perform a gig within the Eaves' pub and live-stream it on Facebook.  They dedicate one song to the leader of the Hunters and rewrite the lyrics to mock them.  And when they Hunters go to investigate, the pair plan to be long gone.  This is a foolhardy move, which could prove to be their downfall.

When the Hunters see this, they're in disbelief at the recklessness and send a ground team to the pub.  The episode ends with the team only being 200 metres away.  Will Joe and Dan be caught? We need to wait until next week to find out.

Top tips for going on the run:

1. Don't use burner phones.  Anything with an electrical signal can be tracked.

2. Don't give up.  You'll make silly mistakes, which could cost you dearly.

3. Don't become provoked by the Hunters.  Joe and Dan could soon be out of the game.

The Gold Rush Review

Number 129 on the top 1000 films of all time is Charlie Chaplin's the Gold Rush.

Set during the great Gold Rush of the late 19th century, Charlie Chaplin plays a lone prospector who travels to Alaska in the hopes of making his fortune.  Once there, he encounters bears, criminals and love.

As is appropriate for a Chaplin film, the Gold Rush is definitely funny in parts, for example, with the Lone Prospector being unknowingly followed by a bear or the famous Bread Roll dance.  I was also impressed with the ingenuity that Chaplin showed.  As well as starring within the Gold Rush, he also wrote, produced and directed it.  He only uses a handful of sets, for example, the first part of the film is set in a cabin, but it remains interesting.  Rather than being limited by this, Chaplin uses it to its fullest potential.

But beyond the comedy, the heart of the film lies in the love story between the Lone Prospector and the showgirl, Georgia.  Chaplin always includes these love plots and they're generally what I like most about his films.  The love plots are always endearing and touching to watch.  This love plot was no exception.  It was the classic story of boy meets girl, but girl is interested in other boy, and then first boy has to fight to win her heart.  This is what the Lone Prospector experiences and it was heart-warming to watch.

Chaplin said that the Gold Rush was the film he most wants to be remembered for.  While it was a good watch, I think this honour should go to the Great Dictator.